Wednesday, August 13, 2008

Toys for boys, and how I really need to get a life.......

Last week Dh came in the house with one of those GPS systems for his truck. I said "oh, that's good," however honestly I couldn't have cared less, other than it kept him out of mischief for a few hours, while he played with it and read the instruction book.

Yes, I am married to one of those, the one that actually reads an instruction book/manual, I know they are few and far between, but yes I am married to one.

Anyhow back to this new toy of his. I personally couldn't care two hoots about this new toy of his, as one, I never go anywhere, and two if I am going somewhere that I have never been before I either go to Map Quest and print out the map, or better still get directions!!!

So fast forward to Saturday night when we had to go to pick up ds and his girlfriend from the airport, as they had spent the week in Las Vegas (they had a great time.) So dh set up the GPS thingy for my benefit, now I have to say I have been in a car before with a GPS so have seen it before.

So off we go and "Daisy" starts to talk to us. Now it seems "Daisy" wants us to go one way and dh wants to go another way???? So after about 10 minutes of driving and "Daisy" forever saying recalculating I say to dh "I feel sorry for that poor woman in that box, she has the patience of a saint."

Dh looks at me as though I have gone totally loopy and says "there is no woman in there?" I say "I know that, but just imagine if it was me in that box, I wouldn't be saying recalculating."

The first time I would be saying "okay fine, you want to go another way, here you go."

Second time" what the hell.......FINE....here you go."

Third time "bloody hell, why did you bother switching me on, if you don't listen."

Fourth Time "that's it stuff you, I have better things to do with my time, and they say women are indecisive!!"

We have a new stretch of highway, and it seems the poor GPS system doesn't know about it yet, so basically we are driving in no man's land for a minute or two, then all of a sudden it starts shouting out instructions and telling us to go here, there and everywhere, on roads I have never even heard of. A minute later it calms itself down and all is well again.

Now we are going to the States next month, so I guess "Daisy" will be chit-chatting away to us on our trip down. Mind you I may be having a quiet word to her, and tell her not to bother talking or giving directions, as dh never listens anyway!!!!

***READ THE COMMENTS FOR A COUPLE OF FUNNY STORIES***

20 comments:

Tim Atkinson said...

A Polish lorry-driver was recently caught driving down a single-track lane to Gibralter Point (south of Skegness) with a consingment destined for - you guessed - Gilbrater! He used a sat-nav thingy, but you'd think he'd have grown suspicious on the cross-channel ferry.

Anonymous said...

LOL that's a typical man. My Uncle did that to get to my house. Used his GPS, got stuck on the motorway, they phoned me and asked if there was another way and I gave them directions. Yes my Uncle ignored them and spent 3 hours in traffic!

Gill - That British Woman said...

Those are funny stories, thanks for popping by,

Gill

Niki said...

LOL, our epic road trip cause our GPS to have seizures! They can certainly take you on interesting routes. Best to have a map, along with the GPS when you head to the States ;)

The Southern Mom said...

Typical male! I spent 1350 miles listening to the thing saying "Recalculate...take next left in 100 yards! Recalculate, recalulate....!"

But, really... be careful...the GPS thingy doesn't know about new roads, closed roads, and dead ended roads!

walter and me said...

Hi Gill, thanks for the dahlia love! Love all those sat nav nightmare stories. We get loads of lorries stuck in the wee cornish lanes because they've followed sat nav and not commonsense!

Kim said...

I was thinking the exact same thing the other day! Our GPS was "recalculating" constantly and I told my DH that I expected her to start swearing at him at any moment.

The maps for those are at least a couple yrs old. On a business trip to Kingston, it told him to turn right into a building. I've heard of others following the instructions to drive into a creek.

My FIL has one and I bet he talks back to it :)

Jasmine's Journey said...

ads the instructional manual. But he is pretty handy , thank goodness!

Gill - That British Woman said...

thanks for all your comments, I guess dh is not being overly paranoid when he says he will also be printing out directions from google map as well.......

david mcmahon said...

Nice work indeed. My toy is a camera!

Jess said...

ok...so now my question is... Why in the heck would you spend money on the thing if you have to print out directions anyways?! lol

Too funny guys!

Sandi McBride said...

Oh yes, my DH also reads the manuals...I randomly toss them into corners and figure out how to work stuff on my own. That's just how I am. GPS systems? I turned my off and dared anyone to ever turn the damned thing on again. It takes me around my elbow to get to my thumb because it doesn't have a clue what a short cut is. When it learns shortcuts, it can ride in my truck. Till them it's to keep it's mouth shut!
Loved this post...by the way, my sons throw the manuals away too!
Sandi

www.ayewonder.com said...

My new toy is a Kindle. We need toys, it's in the DNA. Great story and good laughs!

Stephanie D said...

Oh, my goodness, it must be in the air! I posted yesterday about our adventures with DH's new TomTom on Tues., his birthday. Guys are the same everywhere!

CannedAm said...

Oh my...your husband and my husband could sit around talking about how we never read instructions! Must keep them apart when it comes to instructions manuals. I mean, come on....people who read instructions manuals are just too lazy to figure it out themselves (curse, holler, kick the parts, etc.) ;)

Quite possibly the bane of hubby's existence is teaching me how to use some of the new-fangled toys cause...yeh, I really don't have the time (ahem...attention span) necessary for the durned manuals!

Maggie May said...

I find they have irritating voices! They are a good invention if you don't take them too literally! Might end up in a farmyard.

cheshire wife said...

Our TomTom regularly tells us to turn around before we have even got out of our drive. It's amazing that we ever get anywhere.

Congratulations on Authorblog 'Post of the Day' nomination

cheshire wife said...

In response your comment on my blog - I do not think that I can actually post a link to you. But click on David Mcmahon's comment above, which should take you to his authorblog blog. Then you need to read 'Post of the Day' for August 14.

Hadriana's Treasures said...

Hi Gill, Thanks for pointing out this post to me...really enjoyed "the dotterel"'s story about the Polish driver. There's a good story over at:
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/north_yorkshire/4879026.stm
about SatNavs getting drivers into trouble. Found through this blog:
http://arthurclewley.blogspot.com/

SatNav/GPS...call them what you will...I think "crackpot" seems to sum them up!

Connie Walsh said...

My hubby and kids have a hoot with that thing. First of all they put C3PO's voice on it and then they deliberately go the wrong way so that they can hear the thing say, "Oh dear, at the earliest opportunity execute a U-turn" and then they laugh and look for the next opportunity to pick on the poor thing.

{{{SIGH}}}

Tuesday was a mixed bag type of day. Had the appliance repair guy come again to install another circuit board in the fridge.  When hubby got...