This was over on Tracey's blog and I decided to "borrow" them. Now Delia, is Delia Smith Britain's answer to Martha Stewart, well sort of, she is a fantastic cook and I have always liked her, I know I have at least one of her cookery books, maybe even two. I put a link to everything that I didn't think anyone who lived outside of Britain would know what it is. I have just noticed, both women are the same age......
9 handy household tips for the modern woman
1. DELIA'S WAY
Stuff a miniature marshmallow in the bottom of a sugar cone to prevent ice cream drips.
THE REAL WOMAN'S WAY
Just suck the ice cream out of the bottom of the cone, for God's sake. You are probably lying on the couch with your feet up eating it anyway.
2. DELIA'S WAY
To keep potatoes from budding, place an apple in the bag with the potatoes.
THE REAL WOMAN'S WAY
Buy Smash and keep it in the cupboard for up to a year.
3. DELIA'S WAY
When a cake recipe calls for flouring the baking tin, use a bit of the dry cake mix instead and there won't be any white mess on the outside of the cake.
REAL WOMAN'S WAY
Tesco's sell cakes. They even do decorated versions.
4. DELIA'S WAY
If you accidentally over-salt a dish while it's still cooking, drop in a potato slice.
REAL WOMAN'S WAY
If you over salt a dish while you are cooking, that's tough shit. Now, please recite with me the Real Woman's motto: "I made it, and you will eat it, and I don't care how bad it tastes."
5. DELIA'S WAY
Wrap celery in aluminium foil when putting in the refrigerator and it will keep for weeks.
REAL WOMAN'S WAY
Let it keep forever. Who really eats it anyway?
6. DELIA'S WAY
Brush some beaten egg white over piecrust before baking to yield a beautiful glossy finish.
REAL WOMAN'S WAY
Sainsbury's frozen pie directions do not include brushing any egg white over the crust - so we don't do that.
7. DELIA'S WAY
Cure for headaches. Take a lime, cut it in half and rub in on your forehead. The throbbing will go away.
REAL WOMAN'S WAY
Cure for headaches. Take a lime, cut it in half and drop it in 8 ounces of vodka. Drink the vodka. You might still have the headache, but at least you will be happy!
8. DELIA'S WAY
If you have a problem opening jars, try using latex dishwashing gloves. They give a non-slip grip that makes opening jars easy.
REAL WOMAN'S WAY
Forget the gloves, use that gadget you keep in front of the TV ... that's what he's there for isn't it?
And finally ...
9. DELIA'S WAY
Freeze leftover wine into ice cubes for future use in casseroles and sauces.
REAL WOMAN'S WAY
Leftover wine???? .... Hello!!!!!
Oh and the crazies are coming out of the woodwork for the G20, read this story
13 comments:
You delivered that much better than me! xxx
Hello! I love Tracey, she is a star isn't she, always coming up with more funnies. I like that one! I think I have two Delia cookery books, one is the christmas one, and I am sure I have got another, but can't remember which one it is! Have a lovely weekend! Suzie xx
Smash sounds wonderful. Even easier than instant. Would be great for the midnight attack of Ranch dressing potatoes with cheddar. ~Liz
Great Post Gill!
Have a great wk.end!
Looks like Molly will enjoy her wk.end.:o)
Blessins',Lib
Yes, we're pushing for a 100F any day now. The altitude makes it seem even hotter.
Molly sure is pretty. Good to see a picture of her. Hope the itching is under better control now.
Max and Minnie have that same squirrel! Except Minnie doesn't like it anymore, now that the tail doesn't squeak. Max just wants me to fight him for it, take it, then throw it down the hall for him to chase. By the way, love the new header pic.
~Randy
Molly will have a great time with that squirrel and the funnies were priceless! I laughed out loud. Thanks!
I love this tip....
KEEP YOUR GRANDMA ALIVE AFTER SHE DIED.....
use her dentures as pastry cutters!!!!!
So Molly got a new friend. Molly is a beautiful dog.
Coffee is on.
We've had this toy a few times and my crew adores it!! I have to admit that when I've seen it in the yard or wherever, it always takes me back because it looks so real! I'll bet that's why Molly loves it too!!
Hope your tooth is feeling better and you have a good weekend Gill!
I can see how Molly would love her new toy! My mom's dogs had a stuffed cat as a toy once and he lasted all of live a week. I was like 'That's great, let's encourage them to try and kill my ACTUAL cat!' She dais they didn't need encouraging, they tried to kill him just fin eon their own!!!
I love the joke you posted, I got the American version from my grandma the other day!
As for the crazy, I heard about him on the news last night. he's pretty intense! It's the full moon tonight though, he may have been inspired by that too. I find there are always more, uh, 'special' people around the Oratory at the full moon.
Great tips!
::: laughing :::
My Riley dog has a friend just like Molly has.... it's lasted almost two years now without Riley getting the squeaker out of the tail. ha.
Back to studying for me tonight! Hope you have a great weekend. :)
Hilarious Gill. I loved them all and sooooo true. I have Delia's 'Winter Collection' of recipes. I like her cooking, finding it easy to follow and the results are down to earth and tasty. She doesn't waste time with the decorations either, does she.
Recently in the U.K. there was a programme series about Delia, featuring her life through the decades, starting in the 60's. There was a programme a week, one for each decade. It was great. We saw her in the 60's making black forest gateaux and so on right up to date. Have you seen it?
Blessings, Star
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